The Power of Asking for an Advocate - Not Just a Mentor
Guest Post by Heather E. Tibbles-Vassilev
BWC Facilitator, Executive and Transitions Coach, Master Facilitator and
Owner of HTV LLC : Executive Coaching and Facilitation
Most leaders understand the value of mentorship. A mentor offers guidance, perspective, and support — often behind the scenes. But in today’s organizations, mentorship alone rarely moves careers forward at the pace or scale that talented women deserve. What creates real acceleration is something far more powerful: advocacy and sponsorship.
A sponsor doesn’t just advise you. A sponsor uses their political capital on your behalf. They speak your name in rooms you’re not in. They recommend you for stretch roles. They challenge others’ assumptions about your readiness. They actively open doors.
And here’s the truth: You don’t get a sponsor by being excellent. You get a sponsor by asking.
Why Women Often Don’t Ask
I see extraordinary women — brilliant thinkers, high performers, deeply trusted leaders — who never think to ask someone to be their advocate. Not because they lack ambition or confidence. But because of three quiet, persistent beliefs:
“My work should speak for itself.” A noble idea, but organizations don’t operate on merit alone. They operate on visibility, narrative, and influence.
“I don’t want to burden anyone.” Sponsorship isn’t a burden. It’s a leadership act. Most senior leaders want to champion emerging talent — they just need clarity on who’s asking and what support is needed.
“I’m not sure I’ve earned it yet.” This is the biggest myth. Sponsorship is not a reward for perfection. It’s an investment in potential. And potential is something you already demonstrate long before you feel “ready.”
Why Asking Changes Everything
When you ask someone to be your advocate, you’re doing three powerful things:
You’re naming your ambition. That alone shifts how people see you — from contributor to leader.
You’re giving someone permission to champion you. Leaders often hesitate to intervene unless they know it’s welcome.
You’re creating intentional visibility. Sponsors help ensure your work is not just excellent, but known.
A Simple, Brave Ask
It can be as straightforward as:
“I’m stepping into the next stage of my leadership. I’d value your advocacy as I pursue opportunities that stretch me. Would you be willing to sponsor me?”
Clear. Direct. Professional. And transformative.
The Bottom Line
Mentors help you grow. Sponsors help you rise.
Women don’t need always more advice — they need more people willing to speak their names in the rooms where decisions are made. And often, the only thing standing between them and that support is simply remembering to ask.